0:00:00.080,0:00:06.000
are you constantly pouring into others
0:00:02.840,0:00:08.960
but feeling empty yourself it’s time to
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revolutionize your approach to self-care
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hello and welcome back today we’re
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diving deep into self-care or what
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Deborah F affectionately calls Soul Care
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the term Soul Care might have you
0:00:19.640,0:00:23.880
scratching your head a bit but stick
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with me as we explore the path to living
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a full life prior to this episode you’ve
0:00:27.320,0:00:31.720
probably heard the term self-care but
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let’s take it a step further Let’s Talk
0:00:31.720,0:00:36.559
About Soul Care what if I told you that
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by nurturing your soul you could
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transform your life and
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relationships in this episode we’ll
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explore why so many of us struggle with
0:00:43.680,0:00:48.199
feeling drained we’ll discuss how to
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identify the root causes of our
0:00:48.199,0:00:53.879
emptiness and we’ll look at how to fill
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ourselves up so we can truly give to
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others whether you’re feeling
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overwhelmed guilty about taking time for
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yourself or just curious about living a
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more fulfilled life this episode is for
0:01:04.320,0:01:10.560
you practicing Soul Care Deborah begins
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this chapter with the following
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questions one what fills you up two how
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full do you feel in this moment the
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answers to these questions paints a
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clear picture of what it looks like to
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practice what Deborah feta calls Soul
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Care all right let’s talk about mine’s
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story Deborah F start starts this
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chapter with a few questions and then
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leads into a story about a client that
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she refers to as meline now meline just
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for context meline is a woman in her 30s
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feeling empty stuck and drained from
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always caring for other people Deborah
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describes that through a series of
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sessions they got to the root of why
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meline always takes on this role in
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these sessions they discovered some
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childhood patterns and beliefs now one
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of of these was that she was always
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trying to fix everything for her
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struggling parents who couldn’t get
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along they ultimately discovered that
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meline was still trying to fix
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everything for fear of being alone
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mateline ultimately realized her need
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for change from the inside out all right
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let’s talk about the meaning of
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self-care uh just to frame our
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discussion I went out and got three
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different definitions from different
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sources to help us better understand
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this topic the first one it comes from
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very well health and it says that
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self-care is the practice of taking care
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of physical mental emotional and
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spiritual aspects of your life to
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promote health and
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wellness the second one is from the
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National Institute of Mental Health and
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they say that self-care is taking the
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time to do the things that help you live
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well and
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improve both your physical and mental
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health the third one is from two authors
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and it’s Levan and idler and they say
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that self-care is defined as the
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activities that individuals undertake to
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improve or restore their own
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health so now that we have a good
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foundation of the term self-care let’s
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dive into some of the topics Deborah
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talks about in the book the first one is
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this term self-care now be honest with
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yourself when I started talking about
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selfcare what was your first initial
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reaction was it positive or
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negative now this answer is important
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because it could reveal some underlying
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beliefs about the term
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self-care many people subconsciously
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believe that self-care is being
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selfish next Deborah talks about
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reframing the term self-care as what she
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calls Soul Care or caring for
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yourself the necessity of being full
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Deborah begins this part of the chapter
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saying you cannot give what you don’t
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have for yourself at overflow we
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wholeheartedly agree with this statement
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and I’ll tell you why service is one of
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our core values we believe that a
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central part of the healing process is
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in serving
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others we also believe that we’re not
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here merely for our own interest but
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also to serve one another we’ve seen
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that in helping other people in their
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Journey with brain health it often will
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take your focus
0:04:30.360,0:04:35.440
off of your own issues we also believe
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in service because we’ve seen how it
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provides a sense of purpose it improves
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physical and brain health it helps
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establish new relationships it deepens
0:04:44.280,0:04:50.800
one’s faith and it teaches valuable
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skills you know when people are praying
0:04:50.800,0:04:57.320
for brain health issues to Simply go
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away or praying for Relief they will
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often ask a whole bunch of questions
0:05:00.240,0:05:04.720
that are really difficult to answer and
0:05:02.600,0:05:06.919
while I would love to provide a simple
0:05:04.720,0:05:10.800
answer that this is the three steps or
0:05:06.919,0:05:12.639
the three reasons why God doesn’t answer
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these prayers and these situations I
0:05:12.639,0:05:20.520
can’t what I can do is provide a quote
0:05:17.080,0:05:24.280
by Craig Rochelle that directly speaks
0:05:20.520,0:05:27.120
to this these questions and it says it’s
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through helping others that God often
0:05:27.120,0:05:32.800
heals you so
0:05:30.319,0:05:35.319
when we say that we agree with that you
0:05:32.800,0:05:39.039
cannot give what you don’t have for
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yourself it has a deeper meaning because
0:05:39.039,0:05:44.319
we believe that it’s through serving
0:05:41.039,0:05:47.319
other people that you will often find
0:05:44.319,0:05:50.840
healing for your brain health issues and
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if you are running on empty you will not
0:05:50.840,0:05:58.560
have what you need to serve other people
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and thus this will inhibit your ability
0:05:58.560,0:06:04.800
to find Healing
0:06:00.520,0:06:06.520
now in the book Deborah quotes the verse
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Matthew
0:06:06.520,0:06:11.000
2239 and that’s the love your neighbor
0:06:08.840,0:06:13.599
as yourself verse but I want to go a
0:06:11.000,0:06:17.560
little bit deeper and look at um a few
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verses before that and that’s Matthew 22
0:06:17.560,0:06:23.000
37-39 in the NLT it says Jesus replied
0:06:21.000,0:06:24.759
you must love the Lord your God with all
0:06:23.000,0:06:27.120
your heart all your soul and all your
0:06:24.759,0:06:29.599
mind this is the first and greatest
0:06:27.120,0:06:31.800
commandment a second is equally
0:06:29.599,0:06:34.360
important love your neighbor as
0:06:31.800,0:06:37.960
yourself now Deborah goes into great
0:06:34.360,0:06:39.880
detail talking about how in this text it
0:06:37.960,0:06:42.639
could say love your neighbor not
0:06:39.880,0:06:45.039
yourself or a whole bunch of different
0:06:42.639,0:06:47.840
variations it specifically says love
0:06:45.039,0:06:50.880
your neighbor as yourself meaning that
0:06:47.840,0:06:53.199
we need to love
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ourselves you know if you look in the
0:06:53.199,0:06:57.960
Bible and study the Bible and read
0:06:55.280,0:07:00.039
passages and stories about Jesus you
0:06:57.960,0:07:03.080
will see that he also
0:07:00.039,0:07:05.919
modeled Soul Care practices and we’ll
0:07:03.080,0:07:08.440
dive into those here in a moment I want
0:07:05.919,0:07:11.120
to read a few quotes from De because I
0:07:08.440,0:07:12.879
believe they are very valuable in
0:07:11.120,0:07:15.479
framing the end of this part of our
0:07:12.879,0:07:17.039
discussion she says that when you’re
0:07:15.479,0:07:19.879
when you’re caring for yourself you’re
0:07:17.039,0:07:21.199
caring for your soul and when you stop
0:07:19.879,0:07:23.280
caring for
0:07:21.199,0:07:26.360
yourselves when we stop caring for
0:07:23.280,0:07:28.960
ourselves we become empty and you can’t
0:07:26.360,0:07:30.520
give to others what you don’t have for
0:07:28.960,0:07:33.800
yourself
0:07:30.520,0:07:36.560
Jesus’s examples of Soul Care the first
0:07:33.800,0:07:39.919
one is setting boundaries and alone time
0:07:36.560,0:07:42.680
and this is in Luke
0:07:39.919,0:07:45.479
54-16 the next one was resting and that
0:07:42.680,0:07:48.960
is in Mark 63
0:07:45.479,0:07:51.440
30-32 and napping Mark
0:07:48.960,0:07:54.159
4:38 uh next would be nourishing his
0:07:51.440,0:07:58.000
body Matthew
0:07:54.159,0:08:01.960
119 celebrating Luke 22
0:07:58.000,0:08:06.879
7-8 priority prizing friends John
0:08:01.960,0:08:10.720
13:23 prayer Mark 135 and
0:08:06.879,0:08:14.280
646 so we can see just in these listed
0:08:10.720,0:08:18.639
examples how Jesus was practicing Soul
0:08:14.280,0:08:20.360
Care and this was so that Jesus could be
0:08:18.639,0:08:23.319
effective in his
0:08:20.360,0:08:25.599
ministry living on fullness not
0:08:23.319,0:08:29.199
emptiness now you may have heard the
0:08:25.599,0:08:31.599
phrase living on E or living on empty
0:08:29.199,0:08:33.719
and I believe that’s where Deborah is
0:08:31.599,0:08:37.599
referring to when she’s talking about
0:08:33.719,0:08:40.959
living on fullness you see Jesus lived
0:08:37.599,0:08:43.719
from God’s fullness not self-
0:08:40.959,0:08:46.000
emptiness through those examples that
0:08:43.719,0:08:49.880
provided in the previous section you
0:08:46.000,0:08:52.560
could see the practices that Jesus did
0:08:49.880,0:08:55.320
to make sure that he was living on God’s
0:08:52.560,0:08:57.640
fullness it’s important as individuals
0:08:55.320,0:08:59.640
that we take inventory of caring for
0:08:57.640,0:09:02.360
ourselves
0:08:59.640,0:09:05.040
if we’re struggling with practicing
0:09:02.360,0:09:07.279
self-care or Soul Care it’s important
0:09:05.040,0:09:10.560
that we understand why we need to get to
0:09:07.279,0:09:13.640
the roots of any underlying beliefs that
0:09:10.560,0:09:16.519
are preventing us from practicing
0:09:13.640,0:09:18.480
self-care verse for reflection it’s
0:09:16.519,0:09:20.839
Matthew 22
0:09:18.480,0:09:23.839
37-39 I’ll be reading from the New
0:09:20.839,0:09:25.640
Living Translation it says Jesus replied
0:09:23.839,0:09:27.360
you must love the Lord your God with all
0:09:25.640,0:09:30.120
your heart all your soul and all your
0:09:27.360,0:09:32.640
mind this is the first and greatest
0:09:30.120,0:09:35.600
commandment a second is equally
0:09:32.640,0:09:39.480
important love your neighbor as
0:09:35.600,0:09:41.360
yourself let’s review we explored why so
0:09:39.480,0:09:44.079
many of us feel drained and this is for
0:09:41.360,0:09:46.600
two reasons a many of us are living from
0:09:44.079,0:09:50.279
The Emptiness of self rather than from
0:09:46.600,0:09:51.959
the fullness of God B we often struggle
0:09:50.279,0:09:55.360
with practicing Soul
0:09:51.959,0:09:57.480
Care we all also explored how to
0:09:55.360,0:10:00.200
identify the root causes of our
0:09:57.480,0:10:02.040
emptiness we discuss look for patterns
0:10:00.200,0:10:04.640
and beliefs that are limiting our
0:10:02.040,0:10:07.079
ability to practice self-care which is
0:10:04.640,0:10:11.720
causing us to operate from The Emptiness
0:10:07.079,0:10:14.800
of self third we explored how to fill
0:10:11.720,0:10:17.279
ourselves up so we can give to others we
0:10:14.800,0:10:20.040
talked about how through serving other
0:10:17.279,0:10:21.480
people we will often fight the healing
0:10:20.040,0:10:24.519
that we are searching
0:10:21.480,0:10:27.839
for in order to understand what fills us
0:10:24.519,0:10:30.519
up we look to two question we ask the
0:10:27.839,0:10:32.440
question what fills me up and also how
0:10:30.519,0:10:35.079
full am I feeling in this
0:10:32.440,0:10:37.519
moment now if you struggle to practice
0:10:35.079,0:10:40.279
self-care I encourage you to go back and
0:10:37.519,0:10:43.079
look at the examples of Jesus in the
0:10:40.279,0:10:43.079
Bible
