Speak Life

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Hello and welcome to The Overflow Podcast. My name
is Craig Booker. The title of this episode is Speak Life

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the material in this episode is inspired by seen
by wil Hutcherson and chin way Williams. I will

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talk a lot about mental health but please note
that this is not a substitute for therapy or

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mental health care. The title of this episode is
speak life generally opens this chapter by telling

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a story about a girl named Halle Halle was a 16
year old high school junior. At first Chen Wei

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was blown away by the confidence, poise and self
control shown by Halle. By the end of their first

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session, she realized that Halle was struggling.
According to chin way, Halle was plagued by

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negative self talk what chin Wei learned was
that while Holly had a wonderful loving home

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environment, Holly had experienced relationships
where her friend groups ridiculed and ostracized

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her Halle proved a common myth wrong and that
many people falsely believe that if terrible

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things haven’t happened to them, then they have
no reason to experience feelings of despair. It

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is no surprise that we live in a different world
today than when most of us grew up the amount of

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information that kids and teens are exposed to as
both a positive and negative impact many kids are

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exposed to an overwhelming amount of critical and
accusatory voices around them. What this means is

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that it is more important now than ever, for
kids or teens to hear words of affirmation. It

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is crucial for fathers to know the important
role that they play in the life of their son

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or daughter. The words you say mold them, and
have a lifelong impact on their lives. Here’s

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a quote from the book, I believe this is Chen
Wei speaking, it says, Chen Wei says if you are

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a father of a daughter, I have a special request
of you. affirm your daughter’s not just by words

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and gestures, but by intentional and consistent
actions that send the message that you are there

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for them. The research is clear, fathers play
a pivotal role in their daughters self image,

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self esteem and body image. It can be difficult
to know what to say when a kid or teen is in the

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midst of despair. kids and teens have so much
potential, yet many times they don’t realize

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it. As parents mentors, coaches are caring adults,
we play a pivotal role in the development of that

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potential. The words we use to encourage and lift
up children around us hold great influence on the

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future of our community, oftentimes and teens,
adults can see the glimpses of greatness where

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gifts and abilities have yet to be developed.
By recognizing and calling out what potential

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you see, you can provide hope while speaking God’s
blessings over their lives. It is important that

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adults pay attention to the tone, eye contact and
intentionality. If you find yourself wondering

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where to begin, here are a few tips. Start out
by saying things like you are amazing. You are

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so bright, I am proud of you. It is important
to remind them to whom they belong by saying

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God is going to do something great in you and
through you. You are fearfully and wonderfully

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made. You are a child of God. speaking positive
words to yourself can change the way your brain

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is wired. Following several decades of research,
scientists know that the human brain is plastic,

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meaning it can adapt and change physically and
chemically. In Dr. Caroline leafs book switch

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on your brain. She says that humans can change
the structure of the brain through the thoughts

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we consistently think. In their book titled words
can change your brain Dr. Andrew Newberg and Mark

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Robert Waldman wrote a single word has the power
to influence the expression of genes. So despite

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what some might lead you to believe our words
matter a lot, Dr. Daniel Amen. Came up with the

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idea of automatic negative thoughts or ants as
the abbreviation after an infestation of ants

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in his home ever since he has taught his patients
how to get rid of the automatic negative thoughts

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that are interrupting their lives. Did you know
that scientists found that we have an average

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of 6200 thoughts in a day De with each and every
thought our brains release chemical energy. With

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all of those thoughts there are bound to be good
ones, neutral ones and bad ones. Over time these

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automatic negative thoughts or ants can become
habit forming. Not only are they habit forming,

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but they also take away energy and reinforce
neural pathways in the brain. These can have

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devastating consequences for our brain health.
In the book, Qin Wei encourages readers to use a

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strategy called think, to challenge the thoughts
that they are facing. Is the thought true,

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helpful, inspiring, necessary, or kind? T is it
true, the human brain is incredibly convincing,

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especially when facing despair. When thoughts
are running out of control, it can be difficult

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to know what to pay attention to. One way to do
that is to make a list of any lies or negative

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statements you believe next to each of those
statements write out a truth from God’s word, keep

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the list and a place that’s easily accessible.
Next up is H. H, is it helpful. Sometimes thoughts

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come to me late in the evening, right before bed.
Those thoughts have the potential to overwhelm me

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and keep my brain up late, far past my bedtime.
When this happens, I tend to want to work through

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what I’m thinking to come up with an understanding
or a solution. What I have found is that I rarely

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get to the solutions. I was hoping for leading
me to lose sleep. Here’s something to help avoid

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those late nights of interrupted sleep. When your
mind is racing with a thought. And you can’t seem

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to let it go ask yourself, Is it helpful? You
see, I commonly assumed that if I think about

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something long enough, I’ll come up with some
type of remedy. So it’s time to bust a myth.

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If I think about something a lot, it will lead
to a solution. This is false. In a study done

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at Cornell University, they found that 85% of
what we worry about never happens. Next up AI.

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Is it inspiring. We all have won that voice inside
our heads that tells us something we have done is

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not good enough. It whispers words like you will
never get right. It likes to speak in absolute

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terms like you always screw things up. One of
the best things we can do for others, is to help

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them eliminate two words from the vocabulary.
always and never. These two absolutes cause an

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extraordinary amount of damage in Is it necessary.
Most of what we say and do is not necessary, and

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it’s a mission would save both time and trouble.
That’s a quote from Marcus Aurelius. When it comes

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to the way we think the quote from Marcus Aurelius
seems to apply. Chen Wei Williams says out of the

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6200 thoughts our human brain generates 80% of
them are negative, and 95% are repeated thoughts

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from the previous day. In the book, it goes on
to say much of what we think about is negative,

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superfluous or repetitive. Because the minds
tendency is to focus on unfounded fears and

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worries, it is important to learn the skill of
taking a step back and evaluating the thoughts

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that arise. Kay, is it kind, the things we think
and say to ourselves matter? Far too often the

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thoughts that kids teens and adults have about
themselves or not kind. If one of our friends or

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family members said what we think to ourselves,
we would be incredibly offended. So why do we

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allow ourselves to think or say such things,
of all the things we can do for ourselves,

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practicing self care or self compassion is
one of the more challenging. According to

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Chen Wei Williams, kids and teenagers
suffering with depression or despair,

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often struggle with self compassion, because
the mind in despair has them believing they’re

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unworthy of kindness or care. None of us want to
practice it. But it turns out that self compassion

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really does help. As with almost anything, the
more practice given to the thing technique,

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the easier it can become over time. That’s all
for this episode. If you liked the video, please

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